We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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