Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
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