new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize