She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
