do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Randomize
