yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
