Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
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