Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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