No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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