I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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