Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
