omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
