In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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