Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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