I heard we made out
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize