in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
