I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
They are going to name an STD after you.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
COCAINE IS GR8
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
