It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
