how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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