We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
