Dual....:-)
the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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