I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Randomize
