booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
