why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
