but the lizard people decide everything anyway
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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