I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
