yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize