forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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