In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize