I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
