i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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