Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
