PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I am one with the molecules
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
