I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
We got so high we made milksteak
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I got inside last night via doggy door
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
how drunk are you?
Several
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
