I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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