If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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