so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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