Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
