I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Randomize
