For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
