Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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