She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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