I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
