But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
