The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
He has the fingertips of a God
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