This is not my ceiling
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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