I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
