I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
