she woke up with a sticky ear
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
