I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
