I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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