at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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